Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Why I am Drinking a Beer Right Now

Because of Jack's nasty habit of pooping in the bathtub, I have taken the advice of my dear friend Sally and purchased a small potty to keep near the tub for the moment when he makes The Face so that I can snatch him up and place him on the potty just in time for the poop. It sounds like a great plan, right?

So I get the potty home and Jack has a great time putting the bowl on his head (thanks Uncle Nick!) and saying peepee about fifty million times. He even sat on it a few times. Fine. I put it in the bathroom and we go about our daily routine of eating strawberries and playing with rocks. After awhile, Jack says peepee and heads toward the bathroom. Intrigued, I follow and I even go so far as to remove his diaper and place him on the pot. We enjoy a nice story (Go Dog Go) and he is all smiles, but I don't hear any peepee happening so I pick him back up. Then I notice a small poo, right there in the potty where it belongs! I start freaking out and clapping and carrying on like I've won the lottery until I look down and notice that the diaper I pulled off contains a slight trace of poo and it occurs to me that the pooing happened before I put him on the pot and simply fell off when he sat down. Sorry, I know this is gross. Bear with me. Crestfallen, I flush the poo down the real potty and look over just in time to see Jack squatting and pooing a giant poo right there on the bathroom floor.

This kid is going to drive me to drinking.

3 comments:

Meeshed Potatoes said...

Oh my lord! I seriously laughed out loud! I can't believe he pooped on the bathroom floor...except that I can!

Not quite the Bradys said...

Hee hee hee! As a veteran parent of several children under ten I now unduct you into the fraternity of parenthood. I firmly believe no one deserves it until they have to deal with this crap. Ha ha- pun intended. : )

Sally Deck said...

Oh dear god.
You poor thing.
Someday, someday (she says wistfully), we won't have anything to do with their poops. Someday.

Just not today.